More poo...

Okay, I really never thought that I would write another blog about Dog poo, but here we go!

So this last weekend we agreed to dog sit for my sister in law who was going wine tasting with her husband and some friends. They planned to stay overnight at McMenamin's in McMinnville after touring many wineries in the Willamete Valley.

So, "would you also watch our friends' dog?" they asked. "SURE! WHY NOT?" we said. (Both DINK couples have no kids, except for their French Bulldogs Ella and Stoli who are treated like royalty).

Shortly after the couples left, Stoli wanders down to the basement playroom and proceeds to take a giant poo on our light beige carpet. Not just any poo, mind you--DIARRHEA dog poo.

Yay.

My sweetie husband cleans it up, the kids build a barrier to the basement, and we go on our merry way.

The three dogs (including our own) proceed to play all day, got TWO walks to the park where bathroom stops were made, and were also let out before bed. At night the Frenchies slept on their fluffy (nicer than my own) blankets at the bottom of my bed. My son later crawled into the bed with his asthma medicine as well.

All night long Stoli was letting the NASTIEST dog farts EVER!!! At one point Ella even jumped off the bed to try to get away from it.

OR SO I THOUGHT!

At about 6:00 in the morning I awoke to Stoli standing by the door of my room--below her a puddle of black tar diarrhea poo. I jumped up, rushed her to the front lawn, and watched her poo all over my yard.

Back upstairs I began to grudgingly try to wipe up the mess that will surely be a permanent part of my bedroom now. My son wakes up and says, "What is all this?" "The stupid dog poo'd on the rug and I'm trying to clean it up." I say.

He says,"No, I mean THIS?"

I jump up to look at where he is pointing, and see...

YOU GOT IT--HUGE PUDDLES OF DOG POO ALL OVER MY BED! Not just that, it was all over MY SON! It was all over HIS MEDICINE! It was all over THE BLANKETS! It was all over EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(The thing is, how does a person sleep through being poo'd on? I'm just saying.)

Needless to say it took us hours upon hours to clean up the mess. My son had to take two showers, I had to toss his medicine, I needed to wash my bedding two times AFTER pre-treating, we had to scrub out the blankets and wash them, and of course there was the attempts to scrub out the black tar from the carpet that will never be the same.

Good times, people. Good times!!

BEST EASTER EVER!

Bloggers Block

I hate that the last blog I wrote was about my dog pooping. It's embarrassing. Yet I haven't had any desire to blog as of late. Might be my insanely crazy schedule. Might be I don't really have a purpose to my blog. Should it be funny like my colleague Meghan's? No...hard as I try I'm not really funny. Should it be smartly political and family oriented like my friend Amber's? No, I have a lot of political opinions, but whenever I try to put them into words my mouth stops working. The intelligence just disappears. Should it be literary like Colleen's or a combination of all of the above like my friend Karen's? I'm just not as brilliant as all that. I think my best blogging is about my work.

Work. Lately lots and lots of calls to DHS. The week before last I lost it at work...yes I actually cried in front of my boss who looked frightened. I'm the one who is supposed to keep my cool when children are abused and the state won't do anything about it. This time I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't just tell myself "patience...it will come." Like the family at my old job, where it took 3 years of reporting before the 5 children were taken into protective custody and sent to live with a grandmother.

This time, when the totally incompetent and idiotic DHS caseworker tried to tell me she wasn't worried about the child who is being hit at home not being at school the two days after she was interviewed by DHS, I couldn't stop myself from losing my Freaking mind. I yelled at her. I wanted to hang up on her. I wanted to pull out every flippin' cuss word in my very extensive naughty book. All I could do was pace and cry, and cry and pace. Then, thank goodness the child showed up to school mid-day. Maybe the worker called. Maybe not.

Sometimes my job is beyond discouraging. But I have to hold it together for all those teachers who haven't had the lovely experience of reporting. I have to hold their hand and guide their words and wipe their tears. I have to check in with the kiddos, let them lay on my couch after mom and stepdad threw glass things at each other, or poured hot sauce in their mouths, or flicked them in the mouth. I have to call DHS and listen again as they tell me they'll "Document it" or that it isn't illegal for parents to hit children. I have to keep it together to hope that eventually children will matter. So often they don't. So I set my rats in their laps and watch as they get a little critter TLC. I give them hugs and send them on their way. Sometimes back to homes where no one loves them. Sometimes back to homes where they are loved black and blue.

At night their stories haunt my dreams and their faces stay in my head. Sometimes I'm a worse mom for it, as I guilt my own children for tantruming about small things, and worry what perspective they are getting in their comparatively spoiled lives. Sometimes I traumatize my children by sharing bits of these stories in order to give said perspectives. I don't want them to have the pain that these children face, but I do want them to understand that some things aren't worth crying about. That their lives are not hard because they don't get everything they want.

Okay...last blog on here no longer about my dog's poop.

My dog won't "GO" in the snow

She tries and tries to find the scent.

But just can't find where last she went.
















And so because of all the snow.

My dog implores me "I can't go!"

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow....

So today we had a blast playing in the snow outside our house and at the school, with neighborhood friends and school friends. We used our various snow sleds to slide down our street hill...but forgot to put on our helmets--YIKES! Tomorrow will be different, as Evan plowed head first into a parked car. I saw his life flash before my eyes, visions of casts and concussions danced in my head. Luckily no major damage done. Lesson learned. The helmets we bought for skiing will now also be used for sledding!


I am so ecstatically happy that there is no school or work tomorrow. Yes, Virginia, THERE IS A SANTA CLAUS! I will sleep in, play in the freshly fallen snow with my kids, drink hot chocolate, and pray for more snow, more snow, more snow!

My cat is an atheist

My cat keeps planting himself on top of my nativity scene. He's trying to conquer baby Jesus. Bad cat! Bad atheist, blasphemous cat! Next thing you know, he's going to attack Santa. Nah...he's too lazy.

My graceful self

So last night as my poor husband attempted to doze off into that ever-so-elusive slumber (before my sorry butt should crawl in next to him and instantly begin to snore), I got a major case of the GIGGLES. We had just finished watching several sitcoms, mind you, which started me on my way. So I'm creeping into the unlit room, trying to be oh-so-quiet, when suddenly a vision pops into my head of an earlier incident in my day. Just then I bust out giggling. I mean, full on belly jiggling, tears running down my face, trying to shut up in church kind of giggling. Eddy just rolls his eyes at me, and turns his face to the wall. I try to apologize, but the sincerity is all but lost in the continuation of my uproarious gleeful hysteria.

So what is so funny, you ask? Well...earlier in the day I found myself in a patently typical "Dawn move." The kind of move that won me the nickname "Grace" in high school, after falling UP the bleachers at a basketball game.

The kind of move in College that I was famous for, after one particularly bad night.

On said night I was trying desperately to play it cool in front of my MAJOR crush, "Mr. GQ" from the dorm next door, (on account of the fact that his girlfriend from out of town was IN town for the first time). I was so successful at playing it "cool" that the night's tally consisted of me:
1. Setting my hair on fire while trying to imitate a match trick.
2. Opening a door that was not attached to the wall and having it come crashing down upon me, cutting my hand.
3. Falling on the dance floor while wearing a skirt(in front of Mr.GQ and his girl) totally drenching my behind in the pool of beer that was the frat dance floor, NOT ONCE, BUT TWICE--I kid you not!
and 4. Crawling home on all fours in tears due to my complete embarrassed state, only to have GQ and girlfriend drive by and call to me out the window to see if I needed a ride home. That would be a big fat "NO THANK YOU."
Oh yeah, and 5. Getting back to my dorm to discover that I am...wait for it...
LOCKED OUT! Gloriously fabulous night, that my sister loves to retell to anyone new who hasn't heard it. (Including my children--so not appropriate, and in front of my husband--also not cool mentioning old crushes).

Anyway...back to my giggle fit. Earlier in the day as I was on my wooden staircase in my super slippery slippers, I lost my footing and slipped UP the stairs (this falling up thing takes great talent and practice-don't try it at home viewers!), landing hard on one armpit and my chin, with my legs sprawled out behind me. Let your mind visualize this lovely sight.

For whatever reason as I was creeping into the room and crawling into bed (ooo...I'm a creepy crawler) I pictured what this act of ballerina grace must have looked like from behind had anyone had the misfortune to witness it, and I couldn't stop laughing. I just couldn't stop. I'm not sure I wanted to stop--laughter like that doesn't come around everyday ya know!

So, since I rarely have funny things to share with y'all (all 2 of you!) I slipped into bed, muffled my sillyness and dreamed of the magic of this awesome writing I would get to do today. Hope it was as fun to read as it was to remember...

Giggling like a child makes me oh so happy!!! (following spelling errors not mine)
a buch of peopel falling down

Inspirational Moments

Soo...I've been thinking about what I like about blogs. I love that blogging requires you to take mundane everyday moments, and turn them into interesting and inspirational fodder for thought. This is certainly a challenge for me--the glass half-empty gal.

The other day I read a blog where the mom told of her day playing with the kids, and it sounded so poignant and lovely. I thought, I've had a hundred days like that, and I probably would've thought to myself, "I have nothing interesting to write about today." Not because it wasn't an enjoyable day, but because how do you make that sound interesting to others?

I have found myself lately retreating into cyberworld to try to connect, instead of hanging out with my family and connecting with them. It's not that I don't want to be with them, but sometimes I feel a little lonely for friendship. Some of my best friends are from my kids' preschool, who live in other neighborhoods, and lead similarly busy lives. I've recently noticed that many of the moms at my kids' current school also seem closest to friends from their kids' preschools, or with moms who are available for PTA, volunteering, and foundation. I want to be, too. But working full time again and trying to be the mom is actually more than I can handle sometimes.

So...this weekend I worked hard at ignoring my computer and focused on hanging out with my kids. Sounds awful, I know, that I have to work at it. But, anyway. Kaley and I were hanging out. We played Wii, and Super Mario Kart. We put puzzles together and babysat the kittens. We read and talked. But the most glorious part was we giggled! We rolled on the floor playing and teasing and we laughed 'til it hurt giggled! It was beautiful and silly, and a total blast. I am so aware right now of how close my children are to growing up. How fast time is moving and how quickly they will be teenagers who want no time with me at all. I need to make the most of the time that I have with them.

Hugging, and giggling, and being silly with my kids makes me happy.